Cost Plus World Market

2844 N Broadway St
Chicago, IL 60657
(773) 477-9912

Despite having lived in this neighborhood for 4.5 years, I had never gone into this store. I'd always mentally checked this place off as "the store with the giant wooden giraffes. Who buys that stuff??" and kept it moving. Then one night I was stalk...um, closely follo...er, forget you read any of that. I wound up in here and, in the midst of ducking behind & betwixt aisles, I began to notice that this place sells really cool stuff.

Surprisingly, I left the store as a single man. But I wasn't put out for too long because I'd found my go-to store for classiness. Yep, I am on my way to becoming The Continental. "How," you ask? It is really, ah, ah quite simple.

First, I buy scented candles and incense here. I find that the art of seduction is best aided by sumptuous, fragrant aromas. For some reason, musk is no longer a popular smell/candle. I don't know why. In any event, the World Market (Cost Plus sounds so...Sam's Club), has an abundance of candles, incense and holders from which to choose. Secondly, pillows. Yes, the World Market sells all sorts of furniture, but wood just gets in the way, n'est-ce pas? Oui, it does. I find that a good assortment of conversational adornments adds to dialogue and presents the opportunity to try them out. Thirdly, and this is the most important piece, wine. The World Market has great wines from around the world and offers them at great prices. My BYO secret? The wine cheat sheets. For every bottle of wine sold in the racks, you can discover the country, region, suggested food pairings, tastes and elements of the wine. This way, when you arrive at your Filipino/Japanese fusion spot with a bottle of South African rose', you look like a genius gourmand and no one is the wiser. Until now. Hmm. It's ok. I'm a sharer. A nurturer. I help people. And with the help of the World Market, I'm going to beat this "single" thing.

Recap: candles, incense, pillows, wine = Johnny T getting his Continental on. That's right. Stick to the script, offer no substitutions and you, too, can regale lovelies with enchanting - dare I say, bewitching - tales. But, if things go sour, buy white wine. It burns the eyes less than red and it doesn't stain. "Wow! Wowie-wow-wow-wow!"